Quarantine Day ??

I don’t know how long we’ve formally been isolated, but our last real social interaction was when my mom was here to stay with us, and she left for Chicago on March 6th ish, so it’s been over a month. In spite of everything going on, we’ve been extremely lucky in so many ways – we were out of the hospital before things got really rocky, Brian’s been working full time from home and saving his FMLA time, and both of our parents were able to meet Ruby before the official lockdown. This is such a crazy time, and every week feels more surreal than the last. We’re just trying to be grateful for the time we have to enjoy Ruby and just take every day as it comes.

It’s been so heartbreaking to hear how the virus is affecting people around the world, but for some reason, I haven’t been stressed or anxious about it affecting us until this week. Both Brian and I have reasons to be worried about our jobs, but it was only this week that it dawned on me that if I lose my job, we all lose our healthcare, including Ruby. Obviously yes, I’m aware that this is what millions of people in the country are dealing with right now, but it felt like a gut punch when I realized that it could easily be us as well. It was pretty much a downward spiral from there, and I’ve been in a funk all week just running through all of the worst case scenarios. Everyone is affected so differently by the situation, and nobody’s struggles should be minimized. We’re privileged to have the worries that we do, but that doesn’t mean they’re not as important as anyone else’s. I’m worried about our jobs, about money, about seeing our families, about finding childcare for Ruby, and just the general uncertainty about what the next year (or more) looks like in the world. It’s a whole weird, new, and terrifying world to live in, and it’s 10 bajillion times scarier now that we have Ruby in our lives. I would do absolutely anything to protect her, but this feels like something I don’t know how to fight.

Despite all of that, our life feels somewhat normal as long as we’re at home. It’s been confirmed that we’re definitely introverts, and perfectly content spending every waking moment together. And lucky us, we have an adorably cuddly and happy baby to stare at all day!

The weather was so so so beautiful this week, and we spent almost every day outside on the roof hanging out on our new patio furniture. We feel so lucky to have our rooftop, since our apartment in Capitol Hill didn’t have any outdoor space, and we can’t imagine being stuck at home without somewhere to get fresh air. We were both a little nervous to spend money on a patio set when we don’t know if we’ll be able to renew our lease and stay here another year, but we decided it was worth it now that we’ll be spending a lootttttt more time at home. I love it ๐Ÿ™‚ Next up, a grill! The cherry blossoms bloomed this week, and our neighborhood is snowing blooms. We are so lucky to live somewhere so beautiful in a time like this.

This week Ruby had her 2-month checkup and got her first set of vaccinations ๐Ÿ˜ฆ It was exactly as traumatic as I expected it to be, and we practically ran out of the office as soon as it was over! To add insult to injury, they slapped two bandaids on her soft little thighs that we had to rip off. Luckily, she was smiling at us 10 minutes later, so she obviously forgave us.

We’re very definitely biased, but she’s the cutest, smiliest, happiest baby ever, and I fall in love with her more and more every day. I was organizing our photos, and realized that I’ve taken over 4000 photos since she was born…. 8 weeks ago. I’m a little bit obsessed. I live for her smiles, and I can’t let one go without taking a photo! I think I’m going to lose my mind the first time she giggles!

Ruby….

  • Loves loves loves bathtime!
  • Is super smiley, especially right when she wakes up
  • Sleeps SO WELL! Only wakes up 1 or 2 times a night, and sleeps a 6 hour stretch!
  • Has officially grown out of her newborn diapers ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Our chunky little 9lb 5oz baby has leveled up to a size 1 diaper
  • Is the best baby in the entire world, duh!

OH BABY!!!

**I’m posting some old posts very late and out of order because I don’t want them to die and disappear in my drafts folder! This one should’ve been posted the week of November 3rd, 2019. **

WE’RE HAVING A BABY GIRL!!! And somehow I haven’t published a single post about it. I’ve been adding to a draft since the day we decided we were ready to start trying, but that’s more of a raw post that probably won’t ever see the light of day. So for the sake of looking back, here’s our last few months in a quick summary!

We decided to stop taking birth control in April, spent a few AMAZING weeks in Norway in May, and then found out we were pregnant on June 21st! I still can’t believe it happened as fast as it did, but I don’t think anyone was more surprised than Brian, who told the midwife at our first appointment that he thought it was going to take 3 years! Brian was developing some film from the summer this weekend, and in the same batch, he developed one roll that had a photo of me taking my last birth control pill, and another roll of me holding the positive test.
Margaret and Jack were the first ones to find out the next day, totally by accident when they were making fun of me that my carsickness was morning sickness… but they kept the secret better than I ever expected. We were definitely on a high for those first few days, so we called Paige the day after and told her too! It’s only fair ๐Ÿ˜‰

Right in the middle of all of this, we signed a lease on a new house and a giant renovation, which turned out to be a really terrible idea. My first trimester hit us like a ton of bricks and the renovation work that we were supposed to be doing together ended up being 95% Brian while I laid on the couch at our old place and went through waves of sleeping, puking, and buying renovation materials online. It was a miserable few months for me, and I felt so so guilty the entire time about how much work Brian was doing and that I couldn’t help out.
It didn’t help either that my sense of smell was beyond everything imaginable, and I could barely get within 5′ of the new house without gagging. The actual severity of the smell is still up for debate, but it was too much for me to handle.

The 2nd trimester was a major turning point, and I was finally able to stay awake past 7pm each night. I got my appetite back and I could finally pitch in to help out with the last few pieces of the renovation. My mom came to Seattle to visit and help finish the work too, which was great because we had reached our breaking point with all of the work and she pushed through to help us finish painting, put up drapes, and get the place to be livable. I don’t know what we would’ve done without her, but I guarantee the stairway hallway still wouldn’t be painted ๐Ÿ˜‰

It’s hard being so far from everyone while we’re going through so much exciting new change. I bought my first thing for the baby yesterday (a super soft swaddle), and I can’t wait to get it and start a cute collection of baby things. I didn’t think I’d be looking forward to the baby shower, but I really am! I think it will be so fun opening all of the cute baby stuff and being surround by our family and friends while we celebrate our new baby.

We scheduled our ultrasound to find out the gender just a few days before our trip to Chicago, but I bumped the date of the ultrasound up a day so that Brian and I could find out and keep it to ourselves for a bit without feeling like we had to share the news with everyone right away. It’s the one part of the pregnancy we’d been looking forward to the most, and I really wanted us to be able to enjoy it by ourselves. We were soooo anxious going into the ultrasound, and we really wanted to find out the gender right away, but our little babe wasn’t cooperating! The umbilical cord was hanging right between her legs, so the tech couldn’t see anything. She kept going back to see if the baby had shifted positions, but it wasn’t til about an hour into the ultrasound (and two bathroom breaks later) that she even gave us her best guess. She wasn’t 100% positive, so she ran out to get a second opinion from the other tech who agreed with her that it’s a GIRL!!!! We were so surprised, especially after everyone guessing that it was a boy. I listened to my Ruby playlist on Spotify on repeat, I was just so excited!!

I’m at 21 weeks now, and our little Ruby is 10.5″ long (a big banana!) and she’s kicking me allllll day long. She’s especially active right after I get done with barre class and before bed, so Brian has felt her kicks too. I love feeling her move around, its such a reassurance to know that she’s still in there haha. My stomach is really starting to grow more quickly now, and I’ve bought two pairs of maternity jeans and gotten over 10 new shirts in the mail from my mom! It’s pretty crazy to imagine how big I’m going to be if this is only halfway….

I’m 21 weeks and I feel like I’m HUGE. Someone offered me their seat on the bus, and people are starting to stare at my stomach. My mom (your Lovie!) sent us a new vest to wear that has a special little zip up pouch for you with a fuzzy hood! you’ll be so toasty on our walks through Ballard ๐Ÿ™‚
I’m constantly hungry, I can’t zip any of my pants or jackets, my back and ribs hurt SO MUCH, and you’re kicking me all day long! Our bike ride to work just got 5 times longer, and I’m very winded by the time we get home. Your daddy rides slow with me and we get passed by everyyyonnne hahah. I LOVE YOU!!

29 weeks

3RD TRIMESTER! omg.

Food: my orange juice intake has slowed down a bit, but I’m now massively hungry in the mornings. Still craving fruit and juice and sweets over anything savory. Really trying to get back on the straight and narrow vegan lifestyle, but sometimes hungry is hungry and that iced scone at the coffee shop just ends up in my mouth. whoops
Also, I could really go for a cocktail.

Clothes: I don’t know. Nothing looks good, nothing feels good, everything is tight. All black is safe, jeans are dangerous, and I really wish I was pregnant in the summer so I could just wear dresses. But then I’d have to figure out how to shave my legs which would be a real pain, both literally and figuratively.

Hormones: Going absolutely batshit crazy. The crying thing is here. I tear up multiple times a day imagining Brian dying or getting hurt in some crazy way and I start actually considering locking us in the house and never leaving. I torture myself by reading articles on Twitter about parents dying or watching videos of military parents surprising their kids. We’re flying home for Christmas and I’m mentally preparing myself for multiple panic attacks on the plane, in the car, anytime Brian is not within eyesight. I feel really vulnerable right now, which is not fun.

Body: I had a slight break in the back pain that I had during the whole 2nd trimester, but it’s starting to come back this week so I’m going to start stretching and doing yoga before bed again. I’m sleeping pretty well and don’t want to jinx it by talking about it. We found out that I’m slightly anemic, so I’m taking an Iron supplement with the prenatal vitamins which also now make me burp extra fishy. I’m starting to get some acid reflux too which makes me throw up in my mouth randomly throughout the day, so that’s disgusting, sorry.
My bump is really tight! Her kicks have gotten a little less powerful, and I really think it’s cause she’s getting packed in there super tight and doesn’t have as much room to wind up for her punches. Now she’s just doing these big rolls and shoves where my stomach changes shape slowly like an alien. I’m really interested to find out if she’s head down, it’s weird to feel her moving around and not know which body part she’s trying to shove between my ribs. We should be able to find out at our next midwife appointment, and then get an ultrasound if they can’t tell by feeling around.

Brian: Is an absolute angel for putting up with me. He loves talking to her with his face on my bump, and he’s constantly amazed at how giant I’m getting. I can’t wait to hand her to him for the first time, I think that will be the happiest moment of my life.

Other stuff: Her nursery is currently just a storage room for the gifts that have started getting delivered (yay!) but we really need to start working on getting it set up. I feel like Christmas came way quicker than I expected, and the next two months will probably fly by and soon enough we’ll be scrambling to get it finished in time! I’m not sure when nesting is supposed to set in, but the sooner it does, the better.
Our baby shower is coming up! I can’t wait to see everyone and open tons of adorably tiny clothes! I should probably start looking for something to wear.
We’re still biking to work, but a lot of that is thanks to the e-assist bike I won in a raffle! I think I’d probably still be biking even if I hadn’t won it, but I’d definitely be complaining A LOT.

I can only imagine that everything I wrote above is going to get 10x worse by the time February rolls around, so I’ll try to throw in some of my humongous photos to liven it up next time ๐Ÿ™‚